I Feel Dirty

Passover has passed us over (removed due to excessive corniness) and the reign of your matzah pizza has ended.

As soon as Passover was over for me, I decided to indulge in some leavened bread. With cheese. And that red pizza sauce. And it wasn’t even good. WHY DID I CHEAT ON YOU MATZAH PIZZAH?!

I saw a doughy substance sprawled on the table
I knew that I shouldn’t, but I was not able
To strike away my animalistic lust
Gluttony overcame commitment, Have I lost your trust?

I suppose I must accept as all offenders do
The termination of our consignation, but I still crave you
Oh my lungs are devoid of air, for a miscreant such as I
Isn’t deserving of oxygen as the Bible says concerning an eye

For an eye, a tooth for a tooth, it’s true
Exemplifying karmic justice at its paradigmatic value
Your succulent corpus unchained from what I consider mine
My heart shattered pro rata, the anhydrous shards are thine

ON a lighter note - here's a funny movie

Texas Chainsaw Massacre - The Beginning

You may be thinking to yourself - what the fuck are you saying??????

That's a fucking horror movie and I pissed myself when I saw that!!

To which I'd respond: Shut up you pussy-faggot lovechild, I'm entitled to my opinion. This is the fucking Internet, and I live in America (North, don't worry) so I have free speech.

And my opinion is that its hilarious. The last 20 minutes or so of that movie is practically comedy. Leatherface is a regular Rodney Dangerfield, just with a chainsaw and homocidal tendencies. I was cracking up, I could not control my laughter. Honestly, you can't expect the girl to get away in the end, of course he's gonna kill her. And the blone kid who got drilled (literally, a hole through his abdomen) got tossed away like a ragdoll, only LeatherFace used his chainsaw. Fucking brilliant. MAd skills there. Do you have any idea how hard it is to get a corpse off of a chainsaw without using your hands?

IF you do, I'd suggest lying about it.